Sit back and let me tell you about the 1990s, my children. It was a time when the Internet barely existed, when most soft drinks were transparent and when every popular movie had an accompanying Saturday morning cartoon.
That honor was almost bestowed upon 1993's classic Jurassic Park, based on original images released by William Stout on his website.
Check out these images:
"We made a trailer to communicate the look and feel of the series, also showing how we would combine computer animation with traditional animation. All we needed was Spielberg's approval.
"I heard through the grapevine that [Spielberg] never bothered to watch what we had done," Stout said. "By that time, the word was out that he was burnt out on 'Jurassic Park' merchandising and all of the film's commercial exploitation. So, it never got made. Too bad."
With the crazy success of Jurassic World, you'd almost expect them to be exploring this all over again.
Look, we all like things, but this woman loves a thing more than most of us can possible imagine.
That thing is the move Jurassic World. The reason we know she loves it so much is because she won't stop crying about it.
Have you ever loved a movie so much that you are crying about it while in your car getting ready to drive home?
Probably not. So just sit back and enjoy someone experiencing something beyond that which you could ever hope to achieve.
And again, that thing is Jurassic World.
Jurassic World got it all wrong, guys. Those scientists shouldn't have been trying to splice together a horrible super-beast, they should have been making Disney princess raptor hybrids! Laura Cooper of XP Comics has done the lord's work for them and created these incredible Jurassic dames for your enjoyment:
Chris Pratt's skill with taming velociraptors works with other life forms, apparently. The Jurassic World actor visited a children's hospital in Louisiana over the weekend and this proof popped up on Reddit, quickly making it to the front page.
Reddit user chrysias explained how he got the great picture:
I'm lucky enough to work with a philanthropy that benefits the hospital and I know these kids and their families were absolutely over the moon to have him visit. Considering he's here filming another project and probably had a million other things he could be doing, it's really great of him to spend his Saturday at the hospital.
ETA: if Chris Pratt's heart of gold inspired you, this is Our Lady of the Lake in Baton Rouge. I am but a humble college student that helps raise funds for this hospital as part of Children's Miracle Network. If you have a CMN hospital in your area, I guarantee they could use your dollars. Almost all of CMN's corporate stuff is underwritten by sponsors, so over 90¢ of every dollar goes directly to the actual hospitals.
With his publicity tour for the most recent dinosaur movie well over, it is super neat to see this kind of charity work. Still, though, those kids don't seem too wrangled. If anything they look temporarily stunned and will set upon him, devouring the actor in only a matter of minutes.
Which of these brave animal caretakers will be the next Jurassic Zookeeper? Well, probably none of them but they've definitely got the raptor-taming stance down. Modeled after a now iconic image of Chris Pratt calming his raptor squad from the box office hit "Jurassic World", here are some of the best examples of zookeepers reenacting the scene.